Nail Email Etiquette: Use the Double Opt-In Introduction

I receive single opt-in emails all the time, and I'm willing to bet most of you do, too. It’s high time we start using double opt-in introductions as a standard practice. 

Who among us in the world of hard-networking knowledge workers has not received an email like this:

Now, it seems innocent enough. After all, people make introductions like this all the time. But there's one key component missing that irks me whenever I get these. Rando has clearly asked/agreed to be connected to me, but I have not consented to be connected to Rando.

Now, our friend DD has forced me into a corner, leaving me with three options: 

1. Ignore this email and look like a jerk. 

2. Tell Rando I don't want to talk to him and look like a jerk. 

3. Connect with Rando and take what will most likely be a pointless call/meeting. 

What our friend Mr. Dingus is really saying above is, "Look at me, Rando! I have the power to deploy Aaron's time on your behalf!" 

I'd be more receptive and maybe even happy if he'd taken five minutes to email me and ask if I'd be okay with being connected to Rando. As it stands, however, I feel disrespected, and I have no idea why he connected me to this person outside of a mutual interest in paint. 

If Disrespectful Dingus were being respectful, he would have used a double opt-in introduction. Just like how a double opt-in helps you keep your email list clean, a double opt-in introduction keeps your network healthy and full of people who don’t curse your name. 

Key Takeaways: 

• A double opt-in introduction is when a third party connects two people who have agreed to be connected, and they both have a chance to opt-out. 

• Using the double opt-in technique means that everyone involved has consented to being connected. 

• In a well-executed double opt-in, both parties know exactly why they’re being connected.

Table of Contents

• What Is a Double Opt-in Introduction?

• Things To Know Before Making a Double Opt-in Introduction

• A Great Example of a Double Opt-in Introduction 

Why listen to me?

For my whole career, I’ve loved connecting with people. I’ve even run a local networking group for climate tech professionals! Through connecting and being connected with hundreds of people professionally, I’ve learned the power of the double opt-in. You can connect with me on LinkedIn here.

What Is a Double Opt-in Introduction?

Put simply, a double opt-in introduction is an introduction made after two people have consented to be introduced. Just like how a good opt-in strategy can strengthen your email list, using the double opt-in technique can strengthen your network and reputation! 

Remember, people who want to hear from you are more likely to want to work with you. It’s best to always get permission from both parties before connecting them, even if they seem like a perfect business match in your mind. 

Things To Know Before Making a Double Opt-in Introduction

People are busy, and they deserve to have their time respected. Leaving a single opt-in introduction in someone’s inbox is the business equivalent of ding-dong-ditching someone’s house and leaving a flaming bag of dog droppings on their doorstep. 

People deserve the chance to consent before being connected to someone. Two key questions must be answered before firing off a double opt-in introduction:

1. Is There a Reason for That Introduction?

Before impulsively firing off emails, consider why you think these two people should be connected. Will both parties benefit or are you trying to connect one person to someone else to seem impressive?

2. Be Direct in Asking for Permission

Many people love new connections and are open to connecting with almost anyone in their industry. But they deserve the chance to say no. Don’t be afraid to ask, and don’t be put out if someone says, “No, not right now.” That’s just the world we live in! 

Ask both parties if they’re ok with being connected. If someone says they don’t have the time or space to be connected to someone else, respect that! 

A Great Example of a Double Opt-in Introduction 

There’s a right way to connect people. Use the framework below, and I guarantee you people won’t brace themselves and cringe when they see your name pop up in their inbox! 

Here’s a double opt-in email that I’d respond to right away:

Why The Above Email Works

• The connector acknowledges the value and time of both people involved, not just one. 

• The connector tells both parties exactly who the other person is and how a connection with them might be helpful. 

• The sender acknowledges that this connection may not be important or valuable and creates a norm that allows the receivers to ignore it if they choose. 

Final Thoughts

Don’t (metaphorically) ding-dong ditch people’s inboxes and leave bags of flaming, smelly substance for them to deal with. Ask for permission, it’s the right thing to do. Just like you ask people to opt into your newsletter, you should ask them to opt into a professional connection. 

A bad connection is like a bad newsletter. They clutter up the inbox and end up as clutter that needs to be dealt with. When you’re ready to start connecting people to awesome things that they love with newsletters that actually get read, start your free trial of beehiiv!